Why Do I Always Jump to the Worst Conclusions?

Do you ever find yourself in a situation and you automatically jump to the worst possible conclusion?

That was me last week.

A few weeks back I went to my dermatologist for my annual skin check. She saw a mole on my head that looked questionable so she biopsied it.

The doctor’s assistant told me that if the biopsy came back positive, she would call me with the results and then schedule me for further removal. She then told me that no news is good news, so if the biopsy came back negative, I wouldn’t be hearing from her. I told her I’d be calling regardless if I didn’t hear back in a week. She smiled and said that’s fine.

A few days later my phone rang. I looked down and saw it was the doctor’s office. “Uh oh,” I thought. I answered, expecting to hear the voice of the assistant. When I heard the voice of the doctor herself, I thought, “Oh crap, this can’t be good.”

The doctor then proceeded to explain the biopsy results using a bunch of big, complicated words that went right over my head. I scribbled some notes, planning to google them later to see if I could figure out what the heck she was talking about. All I gathered was “moderately atypical.”

She then explained that I would need to come in for further removal and that another sample would be sent to the lab to see if there were still abnormal cells.

Next she moved on to explain the nature of the surgery. She said she would be removing from a wider and deeper area. The wound would be left open because it’s difficult to suture the scalp and doing so could cause bleeding complications. I would simply need to keep the wound covered with Vasoline so it could heal from the inside out.

Ok, no big deal, right? It’s just a little hole…

Finally, doc stated that if there were still abnormal cells and I needed more extensive removal, she would refer me to a plastic surgeon.

Wait…what?? PLASTIC SURGERY??? Time out, I did NOT sign up for this!

I kept my cool and thanked the doctor. I scheduled the appointment for a few weeks later.

It is amazing what your mind can come up with in a few weeks’ time.

I began conjuring up these images of there being a massive hole in my head after extensive plastic surgery. Plastic freaking surgery.

Fast forward to last Thursday. I sat in the waiting room doing my focused breathing (thanks, Nannette) to calm myself down before the procedure. Mostly I was hoping to calm down my nervous bladder and bowels. (Yeah, I went there, but I have to give you the full picture, right?).

A woman called me in and went over the consent form and post-op instructions with me. Nothing I wasn’t expecting.

A few minutes later the doc walked in and we got things started. The procedure was super quick and since she didn’t need to suture anything, I was out of there in no time. The best part, though, was the doc, assistant, and I talked and laughed the whole time. It was awesome. I never thought I’d enjoy surgery so much.

As I write this, I don’t have the biopsy results yet. But from what doc said, if more needed to be removed, at this point it would still be at her office. Shew! And you know what, if that has to happen, it has to happen. No big deal. One day at a time.

Good grief, see how I got so worked up over almost nothing?

Now, given I don’t have the results back, of course I can sit here writing, all happy go lucky. The procedure was basically nothing. I have a headache and that’s about it.

Long story long, I’m pretty much a pro at jumping to the worst conclusions. I might freak out a little if I get a call from doc telling me I need further removal. But I’m working on trusting God and that whole “not freaking out” thing. For now, I have a (super cool looking) hole in my head.

Isn’t it easy to do that though? Jump to the worst conclusion? It’s even worse (at least for me) when it comes to our kids.

It’s okay to freak out a little. We’re human. But we can’t focus on our worries so much that it consumes us. That’s not healthy.

So if you find yourself in a situation and jumping to the worst conclusion, cast your cares on God, for he cares for you (1 Peter 5:7).

If you’re worrying, start praying. Keep praying. God cares for you and will take care of you.

Share below a situation when you jumped to the worst conclusion, only to find out later that it wasn’t that big of a deal. What did you learn from that?

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2 thoughts on “Why Do I Always Jump to the Worst Conclusions?

  1. Ack – hopefully it’s no biggie! One of my best tools for not freaking out with medical stuff is this: DON’T GOOGLE!!! Or, at least, if you do (because of course I can say that but I’m too curious to follow it), take it all with a huge grain of salt.

    I learned this best when my house was absolutely infested with Brown Recluse spiders. Super scary, right? And if you google and look at the images…it’s terrifying! BUT, what spreads is what is extreme. These spider bites are as varies as bee stings – some people react so severely they can die, and others (like my whole family, apparently), can get a bite and it’s nothing more than a super annoying itch. So even with huge substantial fears and diagnoses, each of us experience them differently.

    My mother has Multiple Sclerosis. Most people automatically assume this means loads of pills, possible wheelchair, and a low quality of life. Yet no one would have any idea she has it 90% of the time. She refused to let that fear define her, chose to intentionally rise above it, and so far, even though she has a “classic” diagnosis of legit MS, she takes no pain meds and has very little negative effects from it.

    More than any situation, FEAR is what cripples us – not the actual situation at hand. Great post – and I’m guessing this hole isn’t too big – you’re still brilliant. 😉

    • Thankfully biopsy came back negative! Funny you mention Google searching – After surgery I asked my dermatologist what I should look for, so she pulled up images of what it *should* look like vs what it *shouldn’t*. Thankfully she didn’t show me super gross images. Ha!

      That’s terrifying about the spiders. I would lose my s**t if my house were full of those things, especially cuz I get any bite and it gets HUGE. I stayed at a state park one time and apparently the mattress in the cabin was full of bedbugs. My entire body looked horrifying. (But praise Jesus they didn’t come home with me – my terrible reaction is actually what saved us. No one else got bit or noticed bites).

      I NEVER EVER EVER would have guessed your mom has MS. Ever. That’s so great to hear how she’s risen above it. She’s amazing!!

      Yes, fear. Stupid fear. I want to punch fear in the face. Because fear sucks. I’m working on not allowing fear to paralyze me. Cuz it kind of has most of my life.

      You’re funny—thanks for the compliment 🙂